Seven Hours is what time is left for 6:00 am of 8th March, a day which I was planning about for more than a month. But come 6:00 am, I will be taking exactly opposite direction of what I had planned for so many day, no not that I can not take the direction planned, but it's external forces conspiring against me.
Plan was to go on a ride which would have been worth, but the destination itself has taken the "authority" to visit it , away from me. Sigh!!!
There is this feeling, which I am feeling right now, about which my heart is constantly telling is true. But can I put that feeling in words ??? I guess I cannot, but I also have feeling which somewhat runs on the parallel tracks but totally in different planes.
2 Months ago, I had decided to participate in a tournament, I was totally excited about it. Just the day I was going to submit form, I happen to ride through few curves (of road) very familiar to me, also very easily tempting to rider within me. But THAT day, those curves and my better half decided to ditch me for few seconds, and there my knees were kissing tarmac. I tried to be brave, fighter but I then knew I have done a mistake, still a feeling that I can make it, I still went to submit form, but the time I reached the venue, reality punched me in face. I couldn't have taken part in tournament because of injury and I had to accept it. But it was really hard to, and when I wonder about why it was hard. I find answer as "I wanted to take part in the tournament badly, but something about those curves was so tempting that I was ready to take risk, but when the outcome is in front, I have nothing, neither tournament nor that perfectly slipped through curve".
The feeling running through me is caused by situation parallel to above one, to understand severity, if you are good at visualizing situation. replace tournament with a person's advice and curve as a tempting new beasty two wheeled machine and replace that surge to sail through those curves perfectly; with a surge to dominating stand in discussion.
Outcome of both is same, I got none of two. But the feeling running through me, of being not able to take direction to planned destination because of being not allowed, because of few surges, is an unknown feeling.
And with this unknown feeling, and a weighted heart, I will ride tomorrow morning, but in an opposite direction, trying to find an answer to this Unknown Feeling
Plan was to go on a ride which would have been worth, but the destination itself has taken the "authority" to visit it , away from me. Sigh!!!
There is this feeling, which I am feeling right now, about which my heart is constantly telling is true. But can I put that feeling in words ??? I guess I cannot, but I also have feeling which somewhat runs on the parallel tracks but totally in different planes.
2 Months ago, I had decided to participate in a tournament, I was totally excited about it. Just the day I was going to submit form, I happen to ride through few curves (of road) very familiar to me, also very easily tempting to rider within me. But THAT day, those curves and my better half decided to ditch me for few seconds, and there my knees were kissing tarmac. I tried to be brave, fighter but I then knew I have done a mistake, still a feeling that I can make it, I still went to submit form, but the time I reached the venue, reality punched me in face. I couldn't have taken part in tournament because of injury and I had to accept it. But it was really hard to, and when I wonder about why it was hard. I find answer as "I wanted to take part in the tournament badly, but something about those curves was so tempting that I was ready to take risk, but when the outcome is in front, I have nothing, neither tournament nor that perfectly slipped through curve".
The feeling running through me is caused by situation parallel to above one, to understand severity, if you are good at visualizing situation. replace tournament with a person's advice and curve as a tempting new beasty two wheeled machine and replace that surge to sail through those curves perfectly; with a surge to dominating stand in discussion.
Outcome of both is same, I got none of two. But the feeling running through me, of being not able to take direction to planned destination because of being not allowed, because of few surges, is an unknown feeling.
And with this unknown feeling, and a weighted heart, I will ride tomorrow morning, but in an opposite direction, trying to find an answer to this Unknown Feeling
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